Illogic: No Such Thing
by januaryfreeze92
Summary: First installment of the Illogic series, pre Illogic: Some Day Soon. Spock departs for New Vulcan when T'Pring demands his return, as he is entering Pon Farr. Nyota walks in on him writing a letter to her, having not even bothered to tell her to her face.


**Hey, all!**

**So yeah, this is a prequel to the Illogic series. In other words, what was supposed to be the first installation. This one is written in first person, sorry for the sudden change - I just felt this one would be better from within the character. :]**

**It's not very long, but I felt I would put it out there anyway.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek, or the amazing characters. I do own the story, though, so don't steal!**

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I fiddled with my hands, a worried line set on my lips as the turbolift plunged me down towards my quarters. I had noted the sudden change in course when sitting at my station on the bridge, recognizing the system we were entering as the one that held the new home for Vulcan, and knew that something had changed. Especially when Jim told me simply "You should probably go talk to Spock."

I stopped before my quarters, not even realizing it because of the autopilot trance I was in until the doors smoothly slid open, revealing that the lights were already on inside. I walked in to witness the Vulcan in question standing above my kitchen table, holding a paper in one hand and an envelope in another. A suitcase was by his feet.

Was he not planning on telling me in person?

"Where are you going?" I asked him, causing his hands to still. I noticed his elegant script on the envelope, my name _Nyota_ there. I set a grim smile in place - I didn't expect what was going to happen, figuring that perhaps he had to help his father with something, or had to attend some kind of ritual on New Vulcan.

"Oh, you look kind of sick," I stated in concern when I noticed how his skin had an olive tinge, raising my hand to his forehead. He pushed me away, an action that stun and caused me to back up a step. "What's wrong?"

"I am entering the first stage of Pon Farr," he told me evenly, not meeting my eyes.

"Oh, I didn't realize you had to go to Vulcan for that, since you can just meditate on the ship or... You know, I could help."

Spock turned to look at me, his gaze freezing my core. "That idea would have been sound if T'Pring had not demanded my return."

My eyebrow raised, a reaction that I had picked up from all the time I had spent with him. "Who is T'Pring?"

"My betrothed."

My back hit the wall as I gazed at him in both shock and disbelief. The worst part was how calm he was about it, how cool and stoic.

"When the hell did you get engaged?" I asked him, flames of anger and hurt licking at my stomach.

"As a child my parents had it arranged."

"And you didn't bother telling me?"

"I assumed you would find the situation logical, seeing as we both sought companionship. Perhaps you had even guessed, seeing as you are very intelligent and are aware of how frequent marriages are arranged on Vulcan," he told me, picking up his suitcase.

"You just _assumed?_ How about all the times I told you that I _loved you?_" I demanded, raising my hand to my forehead to calm myself down.

"There is no such thing. I attributed the words to predictable human reactions."

I thought of my time under his tutelage, how I would watch him in admiration as he worked and taught. I thought of how my affections for him had grown over the years, the first time I told him that I loved him, and all of the little ways I thought he showed his love for me without having to say it. I realized he was still talking and raised my hand, effectively silencing him.

"Leave."

Spock turned to the door, seemingly ready to walk out of this relationship just as easily before spinning around.

"I hope that things will continue logically upon my return."

"Does your logical continuation include our prior arrangement?"

He nodded. "As I stated, both of us seek companionship and share very close levels of intelligence," he told me. I didn't have to ask him who he thought was smarter.

"I refuse to be the other woman. And as _I _once stated, fuck logic. Now I believe I told you to get out of here."

He looked back at me, as if to shrug, before leaving the room. I simply stared after him, sinking down to the floor before my face fell into my hands in defeat.

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**Yeah, not too long, but I just started school again and I wanted to get some background into the series. :)**

**R&R**


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